Category: My Grief Diary

1. Introduction

– I drafted this letter to a dear person in  my  life….she  encouraged me to write. I have relented only because I may be able to help someone…in some way.  – Only a true person with true life experience...

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2. No Place to Start

This is where it starts; at the end.   I don’t want to do this.   In my mind, I am a tiny child laying in the middle of the floor, crushing myself into the fetal position, screaming “NO” while...

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3. No Guarantee

I was born on a Friday in June. I died on a Wednesday of the  same month. I learned to love at an early age, and found that the good Lord graced me with the inability to do anything partially.  I love with  my whole heart, from...

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5. The Speech

This speech was written after not eating or sleeping  for three days. No food and sleep deprivation could be considered a  religious “fast” but for all intents and purposes, I just couldn’t do  it. My mind was...

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7. Dissemination of the Flies

My  brother  was  lying  in  bed;  I  doubt  he  was  asleep………    I walked to him and, like a child, climbed under the sheets and pulled them tightly over  my head. It was the day after the funeral. I began to...

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9. Breathe

“Breathe baby, just breathe.” The best advice I ever got. It’s full of love, and truth. It’s the four words that got me through the next few months. After  the swarm cleared I felt as though my life was...

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10. Calluses

There was a time I questioned God. Interestingly enough, I’ve never  questioned the presence in this  new life. As a teenager, it seemed mythical and impractical. I clung to science, and religion (up until that point) had only...

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11. Holding On

It was Wednesday. It had been a week. Every Wednesday my phone rang with my college mentor on the other line. It was an arrangement I made in order to prompt myself to complete the task I had said I would complete, her primary...

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12. Drowning

Sleep wouldn’t come. Sleep evaded me like  a solar eclipse when    I had waited my whole life to watch the shadow pass. I always seemed  to miss  it,  but not by much.  I  wasn’t  above medication to help; I...

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